Heather's World

What a beautiful Weekend

2009-04-26T16:37:00.003-04:00

What a beautiful weekend. I spent most of it just laying around, kid free. I am so glad that the sun has shown so bright the past few days. It is to great for words.

Relay for Life

2009-04-21T09:50:00.003-04:00

I am a memeber of relay for life, I have joined the team called "faith fighters", here is the website relayforlife.org/martincountyin . You should check it out. Join the fight against cancer.

Sunny Friday...

2009-04-17T10:17:00.004-04:00

Ok, so Kristin is getting on to me because I havent blogged in so long. So here I am. I have been really busy with everything going on. I am in school and I have a Research writing class, and a Basic Algebra class...which I am drowning in math. I hate math, and its by far harder than I expected it to be. Last year I wished I had a math class so that I didnt have to write so much. Look at me now I am complaining about the math. Haha. Never happy I guess.

I plan to go to walmart to night and get the stuff we need. Probably do a little grocery shopping to. Getting pretty low on everything. I think I will also get things to work in my flower bed with. THis way I wont have to go anywhere at all on saturday and me and the boys will just hang out and have a good time. I think we will try to do a little mushroom hunting.

I am thinking its time I get my camera out for some pictures I didnt even get my camera out on easter sunday, just to busy and preoccupied I guess, But its long over due.

I will be going to a Baby shower on Sunday. Sorry folks Im not the typical girl when it comes to this, I hate this kind of stuff. I am not going to stay very long. I really want to fake an illness.. that sounds horrible doesnt it. Haha

Im really wishing that I could take off today ... the sun is shining ... looking like one of the best weather days we have had so far. I could get all my running down early and have the rest of the day to play.

The month of March is going to Make me Snap!!!

2009-03-26T14:05:00.002-04:00

Ok, this month has really not been the greatest, not at all to say the least. You have read where I had damage to the house I was renting and had to move and I am out so much money because of that. Well sometime in the night, my truck was broken into and lots was stolen.

A box ready to ship to fedx containing two directv recievers, and about 30 cds, a bag that had all sorts of stuff in it, books, kids clothes, shoes, usb memory stick, tax papers, divorce papers and a kick ball, yep a kick ball.

Of course I call and report it, and of course I know that I will not get my things back, but its all reported!!!
The usb stick belonged to the government ... now I am being investigated!!! Yes, Im being serious. Tax/divorce papers have ss#'s and bank information. Good thing my credit sucks or they could get alot, however my boys info was on them papers to.

Yes I know you are all thinking was it locked, NO!!! Yes, Alright I know!!!

Now, this is the big thing are you ready..the "keys are in the ignition"...yes folks you heard it right!!! They didnt take the truck but they took the kick ball and my little boys undies...along with every thing else. I am sure it was kids but even so they could have had a joy ride for sure if they had chosen to.

I just trust way to much in this area, I assume that no one will do that to me, cause I wouldnt steal from anyone else. You know they took my stuff, but someone went through my things...UGH,I would have rather they threw it all out in the yard and took the truck!!!

Everyone- If you dont lock it... LOCK IT!!!

Tuesdays R Tuesdays

2009-03-24T09:01:00.003-04:00

Ok, so as I said I watched the movie Twilight this weekend and loved it. I wanted the books so I just ordered them from amazon.com. Should be here in a couple of days. Its good the kids will be gone this weekend. I will have peace of mind and quiet so that I can read. I am looking forward to it. Yea I know, but what else is there.

I did get dinner out of the way last night quickly and we did go to the camp grounds and we played kickball for a while. Grissom and I had a great time. Levi stayed home he wasnt feeling up to it or I am sure that he would have went with us. Grissom is so funny. We were chasing eachother, and at one point when I am chasing him he stops turns around with the straightest, most serious, face ever and pokes my belly and says Im turning you off! Like nanana, to funny! Im sure he has got that from someone but I hadnt heard him say it before and I thought it was so funny ... was a great laugh. So then we went on and on with turning each other off. Haha

I have been feeling so blah lately. Just seem so alone. I wish some much that I had made better choices so that we could have a complete family. I would love to share all the goofy things my boys do or that I do with someone. I suppose I should just be greatful for what I do have and I think I am. But it does get lonely at times. So I just put on my pretend smile and go on...

I dont know what are plans are for tonight, but it is sure to be another enjoyable one.

Its Monday already

2009-03-23T11:23:00.003-04:00

Well, its Monday...I havent got much to say today. Had a nice weekend with the boys didnt do much, I bought the movie Twlight and I loved it watched it a few times this weekend. I want to read the books!!!

Levi was sick this weekend so he was alittle grouchy but not bad. I hate that he is sick over his spring break.

So as I sit in my office, thinking of how wonderful this day is outside wishing that I had leave and could take the day off. However, I have a meeting in a conference room, where there will be men that try to out do each other in who can phrase a sentence better and one who will snip his finger nails and then smack his mouth while eats and he sits off to the side and behind me ... so It takes alot for me not to say anything, but if I get hit with flying fingernail parts all bets are off. haha

3:00pm will come sooner than I think and I am out the door. I think I will hurry home to fix dinner...ohh, I fixed part of our dinner yesterday so I just have to add a couple sides and its done. Then we are off to the camp grounds and probably play alittle kick ball or dodge ball. Should be a fun night.

What a week it has been ... but it is looking up.

2009-03-18T21:20:00.005-04:00

So I have updated my back ground today. I figure I should post something new. It has been over a week since my last post I have been extremly busy.

As you know my little town of Fayetteville was hit with a F3 Tornado and the house we were renting the roof came off the back part of it. So me and the boys had to move. We moved only five miles away into a much smaller place. But we are getting used to it, my oldest has already made new friends andd I am liking that it is much cheaper for us. I was little worried at first, but when you move and all your stuff is in boxes and just brought in and sit anywhere, because thats what its like when you move. We have some kind of order now, lots still to do but it is atleast put away out of site for now. Moving is alot of hard work I had lots and lots of good people to help me!!! I wouldnt have gotten as far as I have without it.

Grissom will be home tomorrow night and he will be with me and his big brother for our time together for awhole week. Those weeks seem like forever when he isnt here. We dont have anything major planned for the weekend. If it is windy we will go fly our kites and just have a good time. The movie Twlight comes out at midnight friday night and we will be there to get it...if we make it that long. I dont know why if we stay up to go pick it up at wal-mart, there will be know way I will be able to stay awake and watch it when we get it home. But it sounds like fun anyway.

Our kite flying day number 2...ends with tornado!!!!

2009-03-09T20:01:00.003-04:00

A tornado came thru Fayetteville yesterday it took part of the roof off our house. Me and the boys hadnt been home 10mins when it happened. We were much more fortunate than others that live down the road from our house. Three familys lost everything others lost garages and barns. One person was sucked from her home in her attempt to get to the basement. Another person was blown down his basement steps. They are very lucky to just have a few scraps, bumps and bruises.

I have some pictures of my damage. But I just dont feel like posting pictures right now. It has been a long day. Many more to follow. As more storms and possible tornados are to come I will pray for yours and mine.

What a kite flying day!!!

2009-03-07T20:38:00.008-05:00

Sunshine was out and so were we. I took the boys to fly kites and play outside. It was a great day!!!

They really enjoyed it. If it is nice out tomorrow we will go again.

Grissom was so scared his kite was going to fly away from him, he didnt want it to get to high up.

F.A.M.I.L.Y

2009-03-04T14:13:00.002-05:00

This was sent to me in an email today and it brought tears to my eyes. I am so guilty of this, being nice to a complete stranger and grouchy with my boys. It will open your eyes and your heart...

I ran into a stranger as he passed by,
"Oh excuse me please" was my reply.

He said, "Please excuse me too;
I wasn't watching for you."

We were very polite, this stranger and I.
We went on our way and we said goodbye.

But at home a different story is told,
How we treat our loved ones, young and old.

Later that day, cooking the evening meal,
My son stood beside me very still.

When I turned, I nearly knocked him down.
"Move out of the way," I said with a frown.

He walked away, his little heart broken.
I didn't realize how harshly I'd spoken.

While I lay awake in bed,
God's still small voice came to me and said,

"While dealing with a stranger,
common courtesy you use,
but the family you love, you seem to abuse.

Go and look on the kitchen floor,
You'll find some flowers there by the door.

Those are the flowers he brought for you.
He picked them himself: pink, yellow and blue.

He stood very quietly not to spoil the surprise,
you never saw the tears that filled his little eyes."

By this time, I felt very small,
And now my tears began to fall.

I quietly went and knelt by his bed;
"Wake up, little one, wake up," I said.

"Are these the flowers you picked for me?"
He smiled, "I found 'em, out by the tree.

I picked 'em because they're pretty like you.
I knew you'd like 'em, especially the blue."

I said, "Son, I'm very sorry for the way I acted today;
I shouldn't have yelled at you that way."
He said, "Oh, Mom, that's okay.
I love you anyway."

I said, "Son, I love you too,
and I do like the flowers, especially the blue."

FAMILY
Are you aware that if we died tomorrow, the company
that we are working for could easily replace us in
a matter of days.
But the family we left behind will feel the loss
for the rest of their lives.

And come to think of it, we pour ourselves more
into work than into our own family,
an unwise investment indeed,
don't you think?
So what is behind the story?

Do you know what the word FAMILY means?
FAMILY = (F)ATHER (A)ND (M)OTHER (I) (L)OVE (Y)OU

Diet Dewless Wednesday!!!

2009-03-04T09:51:00.003-05:00

Well another diet dewless Wednesday has came and I am still on the diet dewless wagon. Its been rough to say the least. I still have headaches everyday not that unsual but the one thing that I thought would stop would be the fact that I am up 6-8 times in the middle of the night I cant figure that one out. I have had nothing but water except for a couple sunny d's. I am doing really good. Last night was a rough one I wanted a diet dew, I kept thinking one wouldnt hurt but in my case it would probably be all over. haha. So I just stick with my H2O...

I pretend to smile...

2009-03-03T14:18:00.003-05:00

Its been one of those days, where you just cry inside but you show a smile on the outside because thats all you can do...just smile. Its really been this way for weeks...I think I could just go to bed for days and days. I hope things start looking up, they just have to...

Weekend is over....

2009-03-02T07:20:00.003-05:00

My Weekend came and went... I went out to eat Mexican with Debbie and Harold on friday night. It was nice to get out without kids. Then on saturday I didnt do much of anything until late in the evening. I went shopping at Maurices, not a good thing to do when you are feeling depressed. Spent way to much money. One of the new shirts I bought was going to wear it this morning has a tear in it so I will have to take it back tonight. I hate that.

There was a benefit dinner at the legion in shoals on saturday night I went for alittle bit just for something to do. I did know the mother of the girl. I hadnt seen her in years. It was nice to see and talk with her for awhile. I was home by 10 saturday night. Sunday, I had to run to walmart and that was about it. I ended up falling asleep - took alittle nap, then I didnt want to fall asleep last night. But I managed to around 1030.

This morning I got up at 5:30 - I rode my bike for 10mins. took shower got ready and thats when I noticed the tear in my new shirt. :( Anyways I made it took work by 630. I have to take levi to the doctor today at 4, I hate doctors offices it will probably 530 when we get out of there and get to walmart to get his medicine. So that is my evening.

Diet Dew Less.... Wednesday

2009-02-25T13:28:00.004-05:00

I decided that I needed to stop drinking diet dew. I drink "way" to much and I need to drink water instead. I typically drink 4-5 20oz bottles of diet dew a day and thats not counting what I drink when I get home from work, I drink a 2 liter a night. I know people that is terrible. But its my diet dew addiction. I am addicted. There I have said it!!!

When I ran in the fayetteville store this morning as a habit of nature I went straight for the diet dew case and started to get a 20oz bottle as I do almost every morning. I said to myself...self you dont need it, I grabbed a water instead.

So as of 10pm last night I drank my last diet dew. Now 16 hours on the no diet dew wagon...I have a major headache and I am figuring it to only get worse, before it gets better.

A fast Tuesday....

2009-02-24T13:40:00.002-05:00

The day has gone by fast...faster than I expected so that makes it very good.

I have to go to walmart to pick up a prescription...so I wont be fixing dinner we are going to eat out. So I can stop worring about what I am going to fix, i will just pick it up.

I am so sleepy and ready for a nap.

Puny kid Monday....

2009-02-24T08:47:00.004-05:00

I was at home with a sick kid yesterday. I think he is feeling better I hope so anyway. I took him to daycare this morning, and I didnt want to leave him. He is such a sweetie. When he is sleeping he likes to cuddle and thats what he was doing when I carried him in. We went to bed early last night 830, he was wanting to go to sleep much earlier but I made him stay awake, didnt want him to get up around 10 and want to be up all night.

I didnt get much done yesterday, we went to walmart to pick up a few things. But was back home early. I would have liked to clean the house but... We watched a movie and played old maid....all day.

I am not feeling much better yet either. I still have this sinus infection. My neck still hurts I am assuming because I have been sick. Or it could be because my boys want to sleep with me and I end up on the couch (love seat) and thats why my neck hurts.

I hope this day goes by fast, I was here early today so hopefully it will go fast and I can get home. I am wondering what I will fix for dinner. Nothing to complicated or that will take that long to fix.

Wonderful Sundays ...bring blah Mondays

2009-02-22T22:23:00.002-05:00

Today... well let me see. The boys drove me nuts the two of them fight so much. They rough house with each other then one gets hurt, crys around and I get so tired of hearing it. My 12 yr old is worse then the 3 yr old about making messes, I tell you he is such the slob. I dont know what I am going to do with him. He likes to play the boss to, which he is the oldest and much older at that but he has such an attitude and if I try to make Grissom mind he has to chime in and help me. Which irriates me even more. Enough of my kid complaining...lol I love them but they still drive me nuts.

We were goofing around today and I was taking pictures of them and I hit the format button by mistake and lost all of the pictures:( so bummed but what was worse I couldnt take pictures said there was an error with my memory card. I kept messing with it and did the format thing again...what the heck already lost good pictures... anyway it works now. I would like to have a new camera but cant afford one right now.

We took a late afternoon nap. I know I shouldnt do that with a little one especially on a Sunday. But we did and he is still running strong. Wish I had some baby asprin I could give him to knock him out. Haha.

I have been sorta bummed this weekend. Someone i thought was pretty special, we sorta had words the other day and I have tried to talk to him since but he is not replying back, I think that is telling me something, maybe he wasnt what he made himself out to be, or what I thought he was. Oh well, I havent time for people that arent who they claim to be, or pout because they didnt get there way.

Im not looking forward to tomorrow. Of course I never do. I hope the week flys by. I am sure it wont. I hope that I can get there on time. I hope everyone has a wonderful week.

Great Saturday

2009-02-21T20:02:00.004-05:00

We have had a good day today. Nothing to exciting but a good day all in all. I woke up at 530 and couldnt sleep, so I got up and started cleaning house and doing laundry made pancakes for the boys so they would have breakfast when they got up. Fixed dinner early so that it was done ... we had taco's. Me and Grissom took the trash off, it was so yucky and cold out when we went, grissom had to have his blanket in the truck. We stopped at the store in fayetteville and of course grissom wants something. I would have left him in the truck it makes it so much faster to run in by myself. But, he begs to go in, please mommie I will put my hat on...and he does, then sticks his hands in his pockets and says I be warm and good mommie can I go in... so how was I to say no.

We are in there and he picks out a yo-yo for him and Levi and pop rocks. His yo-yo breaks before we even get home with it. But brodder fixed it for him. Levi is really good with a yo-yo, I dont know how he does it. I flip it and it doesnt come back.

We ate our tacos and watched Revenge of the nerds, I know not a show to watch for little people but it was on tv land and i figured that they bleeped most of it out or it wouldnt be to bad, except for d'bag... Guess who catches that right off and starts repeating it over and over. He hasnt said it much since then. I am already working on the word "stupid"...I dont know where he got that one, but he goes around calling brodder stupid...drives levi nuts. So we are getting better but he still says it some, I get the wooden spoon out and he will straigten up...lol, for awhile.

Grissom does say some of the cutes stuff sometimes. He is sitting on my lap and I am teasing him that I am going to turn cartoons he says no mommie I am watching cartoons deal with it. He woke up from his nap and wants to go to wal-mart... we didnt go. I dont do walmart unless its absolutly necessary.

We are watching Transformers for the 3rd time this weekend, I am glad that its a good movie, or I would go nuts. haha.

Im not sure what tomorrow will bring we will just have to see. I am almost done with laundry, the house just needs swept again but i think it will be a lazy day. I hope so anyway.

2009-02-21T07:19:00.000-05:00

Friday...

2009-02-20T13:23:00.003-05:00

Gosh I think I am a boring person. I have nothing great or insightful to write today, or any day...

I get to work this morning and Levi has missed the bus I didnt even get into my building before I had to turn around and go back home and pick him up. lol. thats all I could do, I mean I have been late myself many times and I dont have to be any where at a certain time and I dont have to catch a bus. So bless him he does that all by himself, and so its pretty good that it doesnt happen very often.

I am thinking that I might take the boys to the movies...

What a day....sick and on the couch...

2009-02-18T12:05:00.006-05:00

Its wednesday...

I am home sick today. Strep throat and ear infection...yuck no wonder my neck hurt. I have nothing exciting to tell. I went to my friends debbie and harolds yesterday and they had their granddaughters over, so I took the kids for a drive and we went out in the woods and climbed on some rocks. I got little nervous scared one of the girls would get hurt while we were out. It was to chilly we didnt stay out to long, plus I wasnt feeling well.

Levi gave his little girl friend his valentines day gift to her last night. He got her a heart necklace it was cute. She got him a cross necklase and a stuffed animal. To cute. It must be nice 12 yr olds get stuff on valentines day...

I will be starting back to school next month. I am getting excited about it. Something to look forward to and try to achieve better things.

2009-02-16T19:34:00.002-05:00

3 day weekend!!! It wasnt all bad, I did get sometime to myself. Did a few things I paid for on sunday, 3 to many vodka cranberries...oops

I got internet installed today... that was great however, it took him from 10-3 to get it done, I couldnt believe that it took that long. I wanted to take a nap today as well as play but I couldnt do that with a stranger here.

Back to work tomorrow yippee, no more free days until May...ugh

But it will be getting nicer outside soon....sunshine is coming I can already feel it.

I think today has been a good day!!!

How to forgive!

2009-02-13T09:01:00.006-05:00

Directions - How to forgive ... You know that you can google anything...

Step 1 - Think about what happened. ( I think about it alot )

Step 2 - Acknowledge all of your feelings. There is often anger lurking behind any hurt or sadness you might feel. ( oh I know that I am angry )

Step 3 - Express your feelings - write them out, talk to a friend or simply allow yourself to feel what you feel. ( very hard to do, I keep feelings bottled up, dont show how I feel )

Step 4 - Accept responsibility for your own emotions. Although you were wronged and your emotions may be justified, it is still up to you to decide when you're ready to stop feeling angry or upset. ( I am less and less upset and angry everyday )

Step 5 - Talk to the other person about the behavior that upset you and how it made you feel. The odds are that you won't feel truly ready to forgive until you know this person has heard and understood your perspective. ( I have done this but they didnt hear me , they didnt care to )

Step 6 - Try to understand the other person's perspective, even if you don't really agree with it. ( I will never understand )

Step 7 - Rebuild trust in the relationship. Make agreements about acceptable future behavior whenever appropriate. ( No relationship Left )

Step 8 - Make the decision to forgive, and communicate your forgiveness to the other person. Once you've done this, make every effort to move on and let it go completely.
( still working on letting it go, only for myself to move on )

Even tho there isnt a relationship now there cant ever be another until I can forgive what happened and only for myself why should anyone else pay for the mistakes that someone else did. Trust is a very fragile!!! Right now I dont trust anyone any farther than I can see them...

Windy Wednesday!

2009-02-11T14:13:00.003-05:00

The weather is windy out today, I hope nothing comes of it, I dont like these kinds of storms, I would perfer to listen to a rain storm with a little lightening that would be just fine.

I havent much to tell, I have been busy with work and not much else. Me and Levi went to Bloomington with Rene and her girls friday night went out to eat did alittle shopping, we were out till midnight...then, I took the boys back on saturday and levi found him a telescope and grissom got a new truck. We watched movies the rest of the weekend. It was nice.

My boys are going to their dads this coming weekend, so I will have the house to my self and I can watch whatever I want and clean the house and not turn right around and clean up after them, I feel thats all I get done. But I love them and wouldnt have it any other way, well... I would like for them to be alittle neater that would be nice.

What shall today bring....

2009-02-04T12:45:00.002-05:00

Well everyone it has been a whole week or more since I blogged last. You would think I would have a million things to say but I cant think of anything. I love to read blogs, Christy always has such nice things to read, Rene and Misty have lots of pictures.

I drove throu the wrong gate today they usually have a cone in the way but they didnt they had the sign on that said closed... I didnt read that sign, I just drove on throu and Garry Lee was on the wrong side of my truck...all he could do was shake his head and laugh. What can I say...

Today I was told I was a bitter person ... I think I might be in some cases, but I am working on it....

2009-01-27T10:23:00.003-05:00

This weekend was really nice me and the boys watched movies got outside for little bit and took a nap...i love nap time. Of course our naps on weekends always come later than they should then we are night owls. But it is alot of fun. Sunday we went to walmart to get a few things and I let the boys get a movie each and things were good until I smashed grissom's fingers between the cart and the shelf and then it starts ...that boy once he gets mad nothing pleases him for a while. He went to crying and crying he wanted to go play with the toys, we were in the check out ... you know how people look at you when you have a screaming kid. I had someone ask what did you do to him. I hate when people do that. I am already a nervous wreck from him carring on the way that he does ... do you think I want to hear that.

Sunday afternoon, I heard from "My Friend" I told him that I thought he had forgotten all about me...just teasing and then I get this big long speech on how I need to start remembering he has kids and is busy with work and blah blah...Im thinking is he for real. I am a single mother of two myself, and one of them I have 24/7 so I dont get a break. So I say you can stop its not like your talking to someone who doesnt get it. Then I get another speech...and I am accused of giving out guilt trips ... ya me...whatever. I told him we should just stop before somthing is said that cant be taken back. He got all defensive over nothing and in my opinion having a bad day and needed to be a jerk. Now, we dont spend that much time together because Of our kids and that is ok with me. I understand it and doesnt really matter to me if no one else does. Our children are way more important and its not been that long ago that I got out of a marriage and dont intend on making another mistake and I dont want my boys to go throu that. Moving on.

I have two very active boys. 12 and 3 yrs old... they fight, rough house around with each other. On and on... I have to say every time...now someone is going to get hurt and start crying and when they do I dont want to hear it. You know 99% of the time its the oldest starts crying its ridiculous he tripped last night chasing grissom and stubbed his toe well he is rolling around on the floor like he just lost a limb. I guess maybe I should have more sympathy but he is 12...get over it. I do think the toe is broke tho.

What a Tuesday morning with 5 inches of snow and more to come. I wish it could have been this weekend. I didnt want snow but would like to play in it with the boys since we have it. Hopefully this will be the last of it, and then they bring on the spring time. I just went outside to see what it was doing and its getting icy out there now. If it keeps this up I wont be coming in tomorrow. I dont want to chance getting grissom out in this to take him to daycare.

2009-01-23T13:12:00.003-05:00

Another Blah day...gosh when will spring be here.

Been sorta hecktic in the office today. Sometimes I dont like how things are done, but who am I to say anything, I just do what I am asked even if it changes three or four times before I can get it finished. Thats fine. I missed a nice lunch cause I was so stressed/worried about it. Turn in what I have and its fine like its not that important now...are you kidding me.

Then there is "My Friend" we were getting closer, still moving slow but now its like stand still. just been this way for a couple of weeks, I text and email call but he doesnt ... do I take it as a sign. Of course when he is done doing whatever it is that he is doing he will talk, but just seems that it gets fewer fewer between. Sometimes I dont like this, most of the time I dont like this. A million things run throu my head and it shouldnt I should be able to trust... but I cant. I should take it as if he is busy working on something in his house then he is just busy, but I cant, Why not. I wonder sometimes that I am not ready for a relationship just yet not that I am not over the pervious because I am but I am not over all the emotional baggage. If you know what I mean. I want to trust and once that trust is broken its hard to trust anyone..I think. I do know that not all men are jerks. I could spend hours bashing them, but whats the point not all are like the ones I have found so far...

Oh I think I could use a really good cry.

I told someone that I should just always expect the worst that way I wont ever be disappointed! They said you cant go throu life like that. Well if you expect the worst then something good happens that makes it really great doesnt it.

If you’ve been deceived by someone, you lose one of life's greatest treasures you lose the capacity to trust. Because without trust, love is not possible. -unknown

Wednesday....Mid week.

2009-01-21T15:01:00.002-05:00

Well its that time of the week, getting closer to the weekend. Men...whatelse can I say. Ugh...Sometimes.

Then there is this guy that cant keep his mouth shut when he eats...been bad today...haha

Sometimes people leave, and somtimes people leave footprints on our hearts...

What a nice three day weekend...

2009-01-20T08:26:00.003-05:00

Had a nice weekend...overall. Me and Levi vegged out and watched movies friday night. Slept in... well till 9, later on I dropped him off with grissom for a sleep over as grissom calls it. They stayed at Grissom's dads. Levi said that they had a good time lots of fun, watched some car aution on tv. Im glad it was there and not with me.

I didnt do a whole lot, got take out saturday evening, watched movies and played cards. I really did have a good time, but there are somethings that happen and you just cant help it for you didnt even know. That can just "ruin" everything. Then when no one says anything about it, can make it worse i think. I have nothing to compare it to so cant tell if it was normal or not. I wouldnt tell it anyway. Its all done and over with.

Yesterday I had a nice day with a friend that I hadnt seen in a while we went for a nice long walk in the woods climbed a few rocks nothing fancy. Just really nice to get out of the house. I get so tired of being inside watching movies and tv, feel claustrophobic or something. Believe it or not it didnt feel that cold out. I guess since it had warmed up 15 degrees it was like a heat wave.

Me and Levi took food coloring and colored some icicle last night, I couldnt tell what they looked like this morning on my way in. I hope that they look really neat cause he is wanting to go back and look at them tonight. I am kind of looking forward to it to.

Mid - Week...

2009-01-14T10:12:00.003-05:00

Well, its the middle of the week I am so happy about that I have another lazy weekend coming up...ok, not completly lazy but lazy for me I will "clean" my house and do laundry then its on the couch with a good movie. I cant wait. (( Gosh the guy in my office behind me smacks his mouth when he eats and nothing irritates me more.. I am clinching my teeth right now just not to say keep it shut when you eat, slob!!!!))

The boys have been wonderful this week. I have gotten help from levi picking up the house and not many fights between them. Grissom Goes back to his dads tomorrow for his week. I tell ya the week he is with me goes so fast and the week that he is gone goes so slow, it feels so so much longer than a week.

I think I am depressed, its either weather, or something else. But I am in some kind of fog and cant get out of it, all I want to do is sleep or lay around not be bothered by anything, just isnt like me. I dread the phone ringing or someone showing up at my house, for fear i will have to listen to someone or entertain them, and act like I care. Gosh, I dont know what it is but I am not liking it.

Maybe tomorrow will be a better day.

Yep, Monday Morning....

2009-01-12T08:40:00.004-05:00

Today is a Monday, and I don’t care for Mondays...they just seem to drag along. I wished so much last night that it was still Saturday or even Friday evening. But I suppose I shouldn’t dread such yuckie Mondays, because I have two healthy boys and wonderful family and friends. Things could be much worse than coming to work on Mondays; heck I could be one without a job.

My doctors appt went ok, still painful but ok, I felt really weird Friday evening really light headed and weak, it was nice to lay around and watch movies with the boys. Of Course now I think this is the worst part I have to wait 2 weeks, to find anything out. I don’t really think it takes 2 weeks, I think it’s just how they want to do it. They like to make people worry or they just want more money from you. They won’t tell you anything over the phone because they can’t charge you that way. Oh well, what you going to do.

Grissom came home Friday evening and we all had a good time, I told him to pick out a movie and we would watch it laying in my bed, well he picked out about 20, and we watched 2 different ones over and over all weekend. Stayed up late and slept in we don’t do that very often. I am usually up early, earlier than I would need to be if I was going to work. So it was nice to sleep in. Levi my oldest is a lot like me Clumsy...3 split drinks and a broken glass. Now I don’t get to upset over stuff like that, but when you just clean the house sweep and mop and then a whole glass of sprite gets spilt everywhere then you have to mop all over again. Then last night, right before they get in bed its after 9, he knocks an empty glass off the desk and it shatters every where...yeah I don’t yell often but I did last night then I feel bad cause its not like he did it on purpose but its still something I have to clean up.

Also, on Friday I asked "My Friend" a question, I suppose I didn’t ask it very well. I know that I didn’t, but I think it was a combination of pain killers, just not thinking clearly. I think it upset him; I didn’t mean for it to, I have apologized for it. I guess its all ok now, I hope it is anyway. I really like him and he is a good person, I would not want to hurt “My Friend”.

True love begins when nothing is looked for in return

Wonderful Fridays...arent they?

2009-01-09T11:43:00.003-05:00

Well, it is friday, and I am so glad for that, looking forward to a weekend with my boys. I have a dr's appt. today so I hope that I feel like doing something afterward. I am pretty nervous about this dr's appt. . I just have that feeling that something is wrong. I dont usually feel that way, about things I am always positive until I see it for myself.

I fixed dinner last night, bbq ribs, mashed potatoes and mac and cheese...we got left overs so no fixing dinner tonight...wooohooo. It was actually good stuff, if I do say so myself.

Everyone have a wonderful weekend.

Blah Week...

2009-01-08T14:37:00.003-05:00

What a blah week, I havent felt good all week, missed work yesterday, called in but no one got my message. One of the people that work in my bldg lives close by well he came over to my house yesterday and I heard someone beating on the door but I didnt want to get up so I didnt...they came on in, ha...so I had to get up but was not happy that they woke me up. I suppose I should be thankful that someone cared enough to check on me but what ever I had the flu. He didnt stay long since I didnt get out of bed. Very nice, but sometimes ugh.

Thank goodness for pb & j's and grilled cheese cause I havent felt like fixing dinner at all this week. Thank goodness I have a 12 yr old that likes to fix grilled cheese and he cleans up his mess. Grissom will be home friday afternoon, Im glad to I feel like the week he is gone it is so so long, much longer than a week.

I have a doctors appt. tomorrow not looking forward to that at all. Wishing there was a magic something you take or wave make all bad stuff go away. Sure I am not the only one that feels that way either.

“A relationship is like a rose, How long it lasts, no one knows; Love can erase an awful past, Love can be yours, you'll see at last; To feel that love, it makes you sigh, To have it leave, you'd rather die; You hope you've found that special rose, 'Cause you love and care for the one you chose."

Love and Happiness...

2009-01-05T11:32:00.006-05:00

When is it the right time? When do you know that your happy? When you look at someone can you really tell if they are happy? When you look at two people can you tell that they love eachother.

I have only known two people in my life that I thought were truely happy and truly in love. I guess I have set what I want out of a relationship based on what I saw from them. Two people who truly cared for one another, they always seem to put the other first. She would make special dinners just for him not because she liked but because it was his favorite, he would make her things. They went to church. Just seemed to be the right life. Now I learn things, I think it was all a front maybe it wasnt what I thought it was. Now I know that nothing is ever perfect and I know that not everything is what it seems on the outside but but but. Now that one is gone, the other is not really the same person, all ready to move on to someone else, had his eye on someone else for along time now...What the heck is wrong with people.

Mondays.

2009-01-05T09:40:00.004-05:00

Its the new year everyone. I hope you all had a wonderful new years mine was ok. But I dont get that excited about it, just another day. I cant believe that its monday already. Seems like your days off just fly by and the work week drags. I think its supposed to be that way.

I had a nice weekend, for the majority the weather was pretty nice. Me and my friend ate out did some shopping and went home. Watched movies, played cards and made cookies. Isnt that cute. I did alittle wood shop yesterday, ok, not me really but I did help out some...

Bloggin in the New Year

2008-12-31T15:01:00.001-05:00

Wishing Everyone a safe and Happy New Year...

2008-12-30T08:51:00.003-05:00

2008-12-30T08:18:00.003-05:00

Looking forward to another weekend without my kids, I love having time to my self. To do what I want to do and the house stays clean with no one around. I wonder does that make me sound like a bad parent, I just need a break look forward to those weekends.

I had a really good time the last free weekend I had. Went with a friend out to dinner and then to a comedy show. It was really fun. I hadnt been to anything like that before. Had a few errands to run. It was a nice time. We were going to stay in bloomington that night, went to two different hotels and no one would come to the counter, so we just went back to his house. It was still a great weekend. We went shopping the next day. Went to Olive Winery, I tasted the best wine ever and I dont like wine, i am not a drinker of any kind anyway. I have never been there either. I wonder do I live under a rock. I must. No- I have children and a job and dont have time for things like that.

It was a great weekend. I had a really good time with great company...

I really like this friend. haha. He says some of the sweetest things at times. But like all men they can say some of the stupidest things to.

For new years eve, he wants to spend it with me, but I have the boys that night. I guess we will spend the weekend together. I havent seen him in a week. Its hard for us to get together because of our kids.

2008-12-29T14:57:00.003-05:00

I hope that everyone had a wonderful christmas. My boys seemed to have a good christmas. Grissom he is three and he wanted to write santa a thank you letter. He wanted to leave it on the back porch so santa could find it. It was cute. Levi he sat out all the presents from Santa, he thought he was big stuff, he really played it up christmas morning. The three of us had a good time together.

Dont have much else to write about.

Happy New Year!!!

Wishing Everyone a Merry Christmas

2008-12-23T13:32:00.001-05:00

Just wanted to wish everyone a Merry Christmas. Be safe, eat lots, and enjoy wonderful family moments.

Wonderful Fridays....

2008-12-19T08:07:00.003-05:00

I am having a good morning. Went to walmart at 4 this morning to do my christmas shopping. Its all done all that I can get anyway. The greatest thing was no one was in the store. Me and Levi pretty much had it to ourselves and was able to look with no one around, It sure was nice. But I already have stuff to return. That will be a big pain. Oh well.

I think I have writers block or something. I just dont know what to write down. My kids are gone for the weekend. Thats nice I need a break. Of course I miss them already.

Me and "My Friend" are planning on going out this saturday. GOing to a comedy show in bloomington I have never been so I am looking forward to it. I hope the weather is nice. I dont want to be falling down. I think we will do some Christmas Shopping. I'm done but will go with him to finish up his.

I fell last night when I came inside I went to the store and it was just raining and no ice or so I thought. I stepped on the sidewalk and went down, hurt my bottom and my back not bad just glad that I wasnt in front of a lot of people. It was funny, of course I was the only one that laughed, cause I was the only one there.

Tuesday

2008-12-17T09:55:00.003-05:00

What a day, I get to work on Tuesday it’s a good day to. Until I get a text from Levi telling me he missed the bus. So I go home to pick him up, I get to the house all the lights are on TV’s are on and he isn’t there. So I call the school thinking that he probably made it but was thinking that he missed the bus when he didn’t, school says no he is absent, well then I get a phone call right after that he is down at the Fayetteville store. He rode his bike down to the store its about 1 1/2 to 2 miles and its was in the teens I get there to get him he looks frozen solid... we get the bike in the truck he tells me his story that the bus came 10 mins early well I doubt that but ok, he still should have been ready. He isn’t to leave the house without telling me but he said his phone wasn’t working right so he wanted to call me. He didn’t want to miss school I will give him that. He made it to school hour and half late but he made it. I came back to work, I have a cold, sore throat and there is no heat in our office and I said the heck with it and went back home. I wonder when or if they ever get the heat working in here if they would pay for my doctor bills.... frustrating

Family Weekend!!!

2008-12-15T08:30:00.003-05:00

What a great Saturday we had a family dinner our first in 3 yrs. There was about 30 some people there. Alot didnt show up had to work or they had the flu. But what a great day. Lots of food, games, and laughs... let me tell you our family is full of boys and roudy boys at that. We didnt get home until 10 that night a long night for me and the boys. Sunday we layed around in our jammies all day it was great. Grissom wasnt feeling well saturday or sunday but he was feeling alittle better last night. I will try to load some photos of our party!!!

I worry...for the world

2008-12-12T12:36:00.004-05:00

What a day, I want to go shopping but I am stuck at work going throu employee meetings. I also went on line to pay my cell phone bill it was a couple of days late and they always have the next months bill due combined. Well guess who didnt uncheck the box and is now paid up until Febuary I am so mad at my self lets face it Times are tuff and its christmas and I didnt need to pay my bill that far in advance I'm a goob.

However, I sit an think how hard I think my life is right now. But I am so fortunate to be employed and on top of that...its a good job and pays well. I worry about those people that dont have as much as me and that is very little. I couldnt imagine paying for what I pay for and working for min. wage and have to worry about christmas on top of it all. I pray for them. I pray that they have food and are warm.

A cold Wednesday...

2008-12-10T13:48:00.004-05:00

What a cold day in our office I do believe you could use it as a meat locker.
They thought they fixed the heat but we think they turned the airconditioner on because thats what we feel coming out of the vent.

I fixed sloppy joes last night for dinner we hadnt had that in forever. Levi wanted to know where his spagetti was. SO I think I will be fixing Spagetti either tonight or tomorrow night.

I am looking forward to this weekend... We are having a family get together this saturday. It has been a long time since we have gotten together like this. Ever since my grandparents moved to florida for good. We havent seen each other like we used to. So we will have lots of food, games, laughs, and probably some tears.

I am still on a cloud over my weekend....Im such a girl.

What a wonderful Weekend 2

2008-12-09T12:19:00.003-05:00

Ok, Yesterday was alittle busy I didnt get to blog... about my weekend. It was a great weekend had a pretty snow fall...to darn cold tho. Watched movies saturday and made cookies, spent saturday night in front of a fire watching movies and just hanging out. So nice just to be yourself. Not anything but who you are, and loving every bit of it. Went and did alittle shopping Sunday after noon. That was fun, I cant remember the last time that I went to bloomington. We had dinner and came home it was a really nice time. I had great company!!

Yesterday, I am not sure why but my ex husband seems to think that I care about his new found love. I mean I am the one that left so to each their own and I dont care what happens its his business but does he think that I am his counsler well yes he does. OUr marriage/relationship was over long before those papers were ever brought up. So when I say I dont care I stoped caring years ago. You can only forgive so many times when it just doesnt matter what they do or say. Some people are just who they are and they will never be anything else. So now story.... My ex is on his 4th Im so in love she's the one since we split up girlfriend. Even though I dont care what he has to whine about but it is so nice to hear he gets whats coming to him. He gets a little bit of his own medicine. GF #3 cheated on him with another, she lived an hour away and had another boyfriend on the side. haha I love it. He was a cheater. Now GF#4 claims he is a woman beater, and she is so scared. Give me a break the woman is 40. I dont like people that create drama so that someone will pay attention to them and that was my first thought. But it is so nice to hear what crap he is going through. Because you deserve what you get. Im just sorry for my kids to have to see a new woman every month. I dont think that is healthy for them or is it the thing to teach them. Oh yes they stay all night. He is a freak and I would like to say not my problem anymore, but he is the dad to my kids.

What a wonderful Weekend.

2008-12-08T11:27:00.001-05:00

Its Friday...

2008-12-05T13:23:00.004-05:00

I hate being sick. We are back to no heat in our bldg ... again. It will be like this all winter. Good thing I have a blanket!! I have tried typing with gloves but that doesnt work so well. I didnt want to come in this morning. It was really hard for me to get up. Sick and to cold. But my computer account here at work was diabled yesterday right before I left for home. Makes me so mad they didnt even give me a chance to get my files off. I will be waiting to get all that stuff sorted out, I hope that it is back up soon next week.

Not much plans for the weekend, tonight I have to go pay bills, yuck!! I think i will have a quiet night at home tonight. I dont want to go anywhere I want to send my kids off to their dads and clean up my house and watch a good movie and call it a night. I have laundry to do. I always have laundry, never gets finished. I have to wash all the sheets too.

Now tomorrow, I have plans with "My Friend" Matt. I think we are going to go to Bloomington to do some christmas shopping so that should be fun. I wont be doing any of my christmas shopping that will be next weekend for me. But I think it would still be fun, I like hanging out with him but like all guys, they can be butt's when they want to be.

I am so worried about this winter I am worried that my house wont be warm enough for my boys. The pipes will freeze. My land lady will go nuts. But what do you do. Its not if she is helping the matter any she has air coming throu the floors and she doesnt seem to worry about that. I really dont think if I bought gas for the house that it would really matter because of all the places that cold air comes throu. Oh well. Something good will happen soon. It has to.

Its a great big Thursday!!!

2008-12-04T14:25:00.003-05:00

I love Thursday's, cause its csi night and tomorrow is Friday!!!

We had our holiday dinner for our employees today. The only thing that I have really had to do or take care of in the last couple of months and everything is going along fine.... got the conference room reserved, from 1030-1230 and the food was to be here by 1030. Well, someone was in our conference room until 11, I had to kick them out. Then the cater was late by 45 mins. I thought to bad this wasnt someone else's show I wouldnt have cared. But I was a nervous wreck. However all in all, it turned out fine. The food was great and the lady that delivered it was so plesant there was no way I could complain. We had a great time.

I did dress up today and wore the cutest shoes ever and they hurt my feet. They seem to be a little to big and I have blisters on the sides of my foot. Not a good thing. But what ya going to do with such cute shoes I guess I need to buy some little inserts for them to make them fit better.

I am not sure what me and the boys are going to do tonight. Grissom was to go to his dads but of course his dads mom cant get grissom from daycare so Grissom will be with me tonight. Cant for the life of me see why it is so hard to get him picked up I do it just fine on my own. But I suppose he is my responsibitly and fathers just have a hard time with that sometimes and ONLY SOME FATHERS some I know are pretty darn good ones.

What an evening...ugh.

2008-12-04T09:53:00.003-05:00

I am getting a cold, well something more than a cold, I am miserable. I go home to fix dinner last night. Pigs in blanket, fried potatoes, mac and cheese. Now, I dont feel good and dont feel like fixing anything but they ate left over pizza the night before. So it wasnt much but it was something warm. Now Grissom he decideds he is going to help me. He is sitting on the table that is right next to the stove and this way he can stir something. Potatoes are done and just waiting on the mac and cheese. I tell grissom to get down away from the stove so I could go get the laundry out of the washer, I didnt want him close to the stove. This is what he does...he skoots back on the table where he can still touch the stove looks at me all smart like and says is this far enough away now. Already sounds like his older brother. Then back with dinner. Levi decides that he just wants hot dogs for dinner I say thats what we are having, he says I ruined them with the biscuits well take it off and you have a hotdog...grissom wanted corn dogs. Sometimes if I just let them decide I would be much better off. I got them to lay down about 830, which is pretty good, that way I could lay down and try to get some sleep...but again I didnt get to sleep until 12 I couldnt breath. I am hoping that this clears up and I get over it soon.

One Busy Day for me....

2008-12-03T14:54:00.003-05:00

I had a really busy day. It was a good day. I got some things cleared up. I supose I shouldnt worry about it. However, thats what I do. My house is looking pretty clean today... since I have been worring about it for a couple of days, I am looking for things to clean. Cleaning is a great stress reliever. Haha

Im sick, didnt get to sleep until 130am and woke up late.

However all in all a good day.

Want to write more but I have to get Grissom from daycare.

No Heat....

2008-12-02T10:06:00.004-05:00

There is not heat in our bldg today... i dont really see any difference than any other day. But 3 out of the 5 in our office didnt come in today because of it. Whimps!!! No colder here than it is in my house...I put blankets up on the doors last night and turned the oven on and opened the door. It helped out a lot. We stayed pretty warm I think through the night I got up once to check the toes on my boys... covered them up with an extra blanket. The three of us might have to sleep together and keep warm this winter. It wouldnt be to bad but this house is a rental and its old... you can feel cold air coming up through the floor in the bed room. Kinda scary, no telling what else could come up through the cracks in the floor. To cold for snakes I hope.

What a weekend...

2008-12-01T14:39:00.002-05:00

I had this great big long post about what a great weekend i had then I went to preview it and it lost it when I went to go back it didnt go back to that page I will have to remember that. It was pretty long and a good one.

Anyway it was along weekend but a good one with the boys nothing special. We went out for take out chinese saturday nite I offered to get "My Friend" matt and his kiddos somehting and I dropped it off. He has two little ones 1 and 2 so I can only imagine how hard it is to get them out just to go grab something to eat. So I picked theirs up and dropped it off. Levi my oldest wanted to stay and eat with them and I of course said no. He says well mom, I think I should be able to meet your boyfriend, you did meet my girlfriend when I had one. I thought was to funny. I told this to "My Friend" Matt today he wanted to reasure me that we were nothing more than friends and hoped that I told my son that he was not my boyfriend.... Sometimes people can be a jerk without really meaning to be a jerk. I dont think that he would have wanted to hurt my feelings but he has. I think the next time he calls to want to do something I think Im busy, I just might be busy from here on out. Worst part about it, is I really like him. But its probably for the best, obviously he needs to be with someone that is like that someone other than me I think. If I was to sit down now and think of what we do have an still remain just friends then It is exactly not what I want it to be or what I want to have. I have told him all this before...

What a wonderful weekend for such a gloomy monday ...yuck

Turkey Day

2008-12-01T08:35:00.006-05:00

What a day...it was great. Friends, family and good food the mashed potatoes were awsome "I stirred them". Great times. It was beautiful day for it as well. It couldnt have been any better. We all ate to much and needed naps. My boys had a great time playing with the ohter kids.

Of course there is always drama... My uncle had a dinner at his house and invited part of the family but not all. Ticked me and my brother off. But its family what you going to do. Regaurdless we both had a good time. There was more drama but I just soon forget it. It didnt ruin my day.

We got our christmas tree put up that night. Looks beautiful and its too big for the house we are living in. I thought I would pull my hair out before we got it done. Levi is a big helper and grissom wants to help to but he gave us more work in the end. He took off with some of the branches so we had to hunt them down some of them he stuck in the tree randomly and they are hard to find, when that happens I thought we were going to have a few empty spots. But we made it. It looks wonderful...

Well that was it for turkey day.

Mexican for lunch with the girls

2008-11-26T13:30:00.003-05:00

I had a nice lunch out today with the girls, nice to just be with girls once in a while I live in a house full of boys even the dog is a boy...hahaha

Funny we all ordered the exact same meal except I got beef instead of chicken ... dont like to eat chicken I dont fix myself. Yeah I know Im weird. I worry it wont be done. It was all really good. I felt like we were being watched, I mentioned it and they both agreed... but for some reason the movie "children of the corn" poped in my head the very first one and the first of the movie where the little boy is in the diner with his dad and they all stare it was weird ...no one came in with a big knife and cut anyone up so all was good.

The big town of loogootee is getting out there holiday season stuff. Lights and banners...still got pumpkins out. Town seemed busy, I guess everyone getting ready for Turkey day tomorrow. Makes me really miss my family being here. My grandparents and mom and dad all live in florida now...

Missing My GRAMS

2008-11-26T09:21:00.002-05:00

My mom calls me this morning needing a copy of Grams senior picture I have because a cousin of hers is wanting it. I just dont know...I feel like it really cant be. The most amazing woman ever is gone. I know life without her will never be the same. I feel like I didnt get enough time with her, I wish I had more time with her. I wish that I could have went and seen her more often in the past few years...

I saw her the last time a year ago in October when me and my brother went down just the two of us. When we left I hugged her so tight and told her how much I loved her and how much she ment to me and I think we knew that would be the last time we would see each other and as I walked away she says little Grissom will never know who I am and I said oh no Grams I will make sure he knows who gramsie goo is ... I will tell him all about you. That was the last time I saw her.

I thought I was prepared for her to go but I wasnt. She was truely an amazing woman, that I can only hope to be half like her. I know that she is in a better place and in no more pain.

Bored - Tuesday Afternoon

2008-11-25T13:28:00.002-05:00

Its so quiet here today in the office... I am so sleepy I just want to go to bed... I wonder what I will do tonight. I am pretty sure that we are going to have spagetti for dinner tonight or thats my plan for dinner. Who knows it could be another night of pb and J's.

Levi has been in a pretty good mood the past few days, I think that his medicine has a lot to do with it. I have to wonder tho will this last or will it change later on. You know how some medicines work for a while then they dont work.

We are for sure going to get our tree this thursday afternoon and get it put up that night. I am usually one to get my tree up right after halloween I just think a christmas tree is so pretty why just have it up for a couple weeks, I like to look at it for a long time. If I had a really big house then I might have one up all year round.....I think I have some free christmas lights coming that will be nice I wont have to buy any this year. Might even have extra we can decorate the front porch.... Should be lots of fun this weekend...

Just one more day of work this week. I guess I need to go to the grocery store so I can get something to make for the dinner we are going to on thursday ... I dont know what to make really, Guess I better be thinking of something.

First 6th grade band concert

2008-11-25T09:21:00.003-05:00

Oh you know the dreaded holiday programs that we all have to sit through...I have not liked a one that I have had to attend in the past 6 years, however, last nights was not to terrible. They played a few notes of a couple of songs then gave us a little history lesson on the instrument its self. It lasted about an hour and ten min. not to bad at all. I know people probably get into these little concerts and all that holiday singing but I just dont ... I love the holidays but these kid affairs I dont. I always want to watch mine then get out of there but you can never leave until they are all over with. Anyway with him being in band I guess I better get used to it.

I didnt fix dinner last night levi fixed grilled cheese and thats what he had and I had peanut butter and jelly. I know what a nice dinner, but it did the trick. We get home last night and we got ready for bed and that was it, was a lazy night. Watched alittle tv and went to bed.

What a good weekend.

2008-11-24T09:11:00.002-05:00

Had a good weekend... Friday Night I really wanted chinese food and I asked my friend debbie to go with me and she said yes and then she called to canceled five mins. later. So I didnt get chinese food friday night I ended up at Bo-macs and got a cheese basket, not what I was wanting but it got rid of my hunger. I love those little pot sticker things, and that is what i wanted. I went out to see my friend Jill for alittle while. I got home around 945, started laundry and took a bath and layed down cant even remember falling asleep.

I woke up at 4 in the morning on saturday and couldnt get back to sleep, so I just got up and finished my laundry, cleaned out the fridge, did the dishes from that. Fed the dog and hauled the trash off. It was soooo cold in my house on saturday, I was glad my boys werent there. We have base board heat in the bedrooms and a heater in the bath room wall. I am hoping we can make it on that for the winter, because gas was just to expensive and I couldnt see how I was going to be able to get any.

Saturday afternoon I went to a friends house he has a wood stove fireplace thing and it was nice and toasty there. We just layed around and watched movies and played cards he is sick and thats what he felt like doing but we dont do much and that is fine with me, cause I can really be a home body. Maybe its because I am getting older. But requardless I always have a good time, even when I woke up sunday morning and had stuffy nose and a sore throat, it was still worth it. I really enjoy hanging out with him. He is alot of fun. He of course wants me to talk more, when he says that I have even a harder time of finding something to talk about. My mind really goes blank, I cant figure it out, and I dont think that I will considering its always been this way.

Sunday around noon I finally got my chinese it wasnt what I wanted because that place was closed. But it was still very good. We came home and fell asleep on the couch watching a movie. We were goofing around later and I almost said those words, yes I am sure you know what words I am talking about...Im not going to say them because I am not ready for them. I think it was because I was having such a good time and it was just a moment. I have had to many disappointments and I dont want to think that way for along time, I want to just be happy for now and I am happy.

I couldnt sleep last night, so I didnt want to get up this morning. But I am at work and bored. I wish I had more to do.

Ok now what...is this what people blog about... well it is my world...

Its Friday .... Yeah

2008-11-21T14:43:00.004-05:00

I am so glad this day is almost over for me. It has been a good day just a long day.

I will be kid free for the weekend. Looking forward to relaxin just being me...not a mom. Not that I dont love being a mom, but all moms need a break every now and then. I have no plans for the weekend, I will probably do some cleaning and laundry when do you not have to do that. Its going to be a great weekend for a good movie on the couch. Love those weekends.

I havent decided what I am doing for Thanksgiving yet either...I know that I wont have atleast one child, so I dont think i will be fixing a big turkey for just the 2 of us. He maybe invited to go to his dads for Thanksgiving but not sure and if so I will be home alone. I wish that I had more family here. I might put up my christmas tree. I could get it all put together and then let the kids put the decorations on it when they get home.

I wont have to fix dinner tonight for just me. Besides I fixed dinner last night and neither me or Levi ate it, we were just to tired and not in the mood. Dinner is ready just needs heated up. I made a really good chicken and rice cassarole...its pretty good.

2008-11-21T09:12:00.003-05:00

Is winter here or what? It came so fast this year. I still cant get over the fact that summer is gone, fall has came and went now it will be a long wait till we see green grass and tree's.

Levi came home in a really good mood yesterday saying that he got all of his work done in class and that he had no homework. I was very skeptical but said that is great Levi but that I would talking with your teachers. He really did seem to be different yesterday. He even brought home his music stuff to practice...

This is some of their reply's....

"Levi had a great day yesterday for me. Wow, what a change. He was more focused and really wanted to get everything completed.
We have a test on Monday, over lessons 1 and 2 ch. 19.
After school, I was speaking with another teacher and Levi came up, and I turned to him to asked what he needed....but, before I could, he said "excuse me for interrupting, but do we have any homework tonight?"
I think that should explain it all....he really did have a good day yesterday."

"I gave a quiz yesterday, so there was no homework. Yes, he was in good spirits yesterday... had his agenda filled out, his work all done, and all answers correct."

"He was motivated yesterday.
I will grade the packet today and let you know how the work went."

"His behavior was leaps and bounds above what we've seen all year. It was a very, very good day. He scored 85% on a very difficult essay test, and his Language homework was "A" level. Keep it up!"

I am on the verge of tears...you cant possible imagine how good it feels to hear these words, from teachers that were ready to kick him out of the class room and want to hold him back in the sixth grade again. Gosh, I was feeling guilty about putting him on medicine but now I feel guilty for not doing it sooner.

Well lets all keep our fingers crossed and pray for this to continue.

oh my this is a Really good day for me.

Love Thursdays

2008-11-20T10:48:00.000-05:00

I so love Thursday's because tomorrow is FRIDAY... then the weekend starts however, it always go by way to fast. Also on Thursday's I get to watch my favorite show "CSI"... I also clean, clean my house on Thursdays. Im not sure why but thursday's always seems to be the day. Works out for the best that way I can stay up to watch tv and then I dont have much to do over the weekend.

I took my oldest Levi to the doctor yesterday, they did put him on a new medicine, Vyvanse, for his ADD.. I know that medicine is not a cure all for his problems but I have tried to do without it and I think this might help. I do have my fingers crossed.

Yesterday I picked him up from school earlier than i needed to because I had gotten another letter from one of his teachers telling me that he had lost his work packet that they work from it daily and now he will have many zero's in the grade book if he cant find it. How do you lose something like that, i can see miss placing it, but to completely lose it. So I took him down to his locker in front of all those kids to look for it, with him. Not a good thing for him very embarrassing but you know what Im so sick of this kind of stuff its something everyday. I say either way he is going to do his school work whether he wants to or not if I have to show up everyday and sit with him or something.

My little one will be going to his dads tonight staying for his week. I will be lost, he is three and i feel like he is the only one normal in our house. He is so wound up when he gets home he goes non stop until he crashes when its time for bed. I wish I had just an ounce of his energy. He says some of hte craziest stuff. But its so innocent ... I love to see his face when he looks at stuff, its like its for the first time, some of it is for the first time. He is fascinated by simple things. What I would give for everyhting to be simple.

I wonder what we are going to have for dinner tonight... I want bbq ribs and mac and cheese, but I think I dont want to go to the grocery store so that is out. Maybe spagetti something simple. I hate worring about dinner, I start my worring as soon as I wake up...oh wait I worry about everything all day and all night long. ha

What a week so far

2008-11-19T11:00:00.000-05:00

It has been a rough week with the boys. My twelve year old is having a really hard with school. I dont look forward to nights at home with him and his attitude and homework. It seems its always a fight to get him to do anything. He is in the 6th grade and he is failing and they are already talking about holding him in the 6th grade for another year. I really hate it, I have such a smart boy but he doesnt want to do the work. He just doesnt care about his school work. What brings his grades down is the homework and class work. He gets mostly zero's on all his work, because he just doesnt want to do it and what we do at home he wont turn it in. However when it comes test time he makes 100's + on all tests but they dont count enough toward the over all grade to make the grades high enough not to be f's I cant get him to understand that he cant fail that he needs to try harder and do what he has to do whether he wants to or not. I have grounded him from TV, video games, made him stay in his room, nothing seems to matter. Back at the begining of this grading period he was acting up in class and he had really long hair so I made him shave it off. He was so mad at me for doing it but he was acting like a hoodlum and I didnt want him to look like one as well. We cut it off. I told him if he brought his grades up that he could grow his back out long and he dont care about that anymore. He is fine with it the way that it is. He had detention this morning before school today, because he was throwing pens across the room at another student. Of course he lied about it said the teachers are all against him. That they just dont like him. He thinks that all adults are against him, he tells people that I hit him. I dont hit either one of my boys and I know one day someone is going to hear that and turn me in and then it will be a big mess. I have tried to explain that you cant say those things when they are not true ...because of all the people you would hurt and including yourself. It doesnt matter. What do i do with him...

More Same Day....

2008-11-17T13:57:00.000-05:00

Let see if I can think of other stuff...

What did i do today... Me and Kristin rearranged Brians desk and he is always complaining about how hot it is...so we hid a heater in his area so that it stayed rather warm over there. He doesnt notice he just opens the window more.
I want to go home and clean up my house, the boys room needs picked up and clothes put away. I want Levi to do it but it always seems like such a big deal so I just do it myself.
I want to dust sweep and mop, I did mention that I have a little OCD, so they say... I like to clean stuff. I like to clean other peoples houses, I prefer for them not to be there I dont like someone to watch me clean.
I'm not sure what we are going to have for dinner I think chili sounds pretty good and maybe some grilled cheese's....

Monday 11/17/2008

2008-11-17T13:42:00.000-05:00

Today has been a pretty good day ... I havent done much but what else is new I wish I was at home doing something. What do people blog about, I am new to this what am I supposed to type about. Its snowing and I hate when the sun doesnt shine. What is new I cant think of anything to type about just like I cant think of anything to talk about most of the time. HAHAHa